Your mate reflects you like a mirror. Take note. The good, the bad and the ugly.
Good moments, good traits, good emotions are easy to trace back to you. However, it seems the bad and the ugly are oftentimes dismissed towards the other. Let’s dig into how the cracks in the mirror are part of the reflection for two people in a relationship.
It is so easy to blame the other in anger but it is best to use that energy to look within to see how you match the other person’s flaws.
Sometimes, two people in a relationship have the same issue but have two totally different ways to express it. For instance, two people may feel insecure. One controls what the other person is doing while the other one is following along to keep the peace in the relationship. The actions are different but the root is the same. This is one mirroring effect in relationships.
It is so easy to hold bitterness when a relationship ends and to say he or she is no damn good but it is better to use that energy to recognize both sides of the relationship and how you contribute to the result.
Let’s take the same example: it would be easy for the controlled one to hold bitterness once the relationship ends and say it is all that person’s fault that he or she is broken. However, one came to the relationship already broken or else one would not have accepted the other’s controlling ways from the get go. Let’s be honest. It’s not easy to swallow the truth sometimes but it is always necessary in order to truly heal. This process does not mean one blames everything on oneself and negates the other’s part but it does mean one holds equal responsibility for the relationship. Once one sees the reflection, one can see their own self a lot clearer and take note of what is needed to change or improve in order to have a healthier relationship the next time. If this does not happen, one will fall into the same relationship pattern over and over again, hoping for a different result–insanity at its finest.
It is easy to play the victim in a relationship but it is wise to be the victor in the situation.
It is so much easier to point the finger at the other as if one has no power energetically while with that person. Everything and everyone has an energy frequency and we align to energy that is similar to ours whether it’s high one day, low the next; we sense, we feel, we create the visuals, the emotions, the life that plays around us so of course, in an intimate relationship, both parties are playing a crucial role in its display. To hand out your powerful role to the other is not fair to yourself. One positive way to grab that power back is through compassion, forgiveness and appreciation. Forgive yourself. Forgive the other (for your sake). Find compassion towards yourself and towards the other (for it is obvious that person needs it just as much as you for you two are mirrors). Appreciate the experience the two of you shared and the lessons that came with it. Now, this does not mean that one has to make any contact with the other at any point, nor have to share their compassion, forgiveness and appreciation with that person. This action can be (and probably should be) an inner process for one to start healing those cracks in the mirror so the reflection is clearer and you find someone that mirrors you the way you wish to see yourself.